Looking forward to the end of my double life as Alan Partridge

March 08, 2016

For the last 3 years, I’ve been staying in hotels at least 2 nights a week, and this is my last week of it. We’re moving back to London, and I am definitely ready to stop living like Alan Partridge.

At first I quite liked my strange double life. When I was making the most of it, I almost had the best bits of family life combined with the best bits of being single. There’s a lot to be said for working from home 2 days a week, and being able to walk to work on 2 other mornings a week. There are some other good bits too. Being able to have nights out in central London without long journeys home. Racking up lots of hotel loyalty points. Having your employer pay for your dinner. The feeling of arriving home to family on a Thursday evening, with absence having made the heart grow fonder. Being able to afford a house because you’re earning London wages but living in Cardiff.

But it started to drag, and especially in the last few months, I’ve started to find more and more faults with it; more little niggles that add up to a big pile of annoyance. Being woken by lift noises in the night. Falling into the trap of not making plans to go out during the week, so you end up working late, then being too tired and/or lazy to do anything except go back to the hotel and eat room service. Getting bored of the room service menu. The strange feeling of knowing the layout of the hotel better than the receptionists do. Hardly ever going out at the weekend because you want to spend time with your family. Hardly knowing anyone where you live because you only spend time with your family. Needing to catch up on sleep at the weekend because you’ve slept so badly in the week.

Yes, I’m aware that these are some real First World Problems here, but they’re part of my life (and thankfully not for much longer), so I’m having a moan about them. I’m glad that all of these things will be going away soon. I’m glad that I’ll be able to ride my bike to work again. I’m glad that I’ll be able to live one full life rather than two separate half-lives. Most of all, I’m glad that I’ll be able to leave the office and go home to my family every day.